Update period: September 7 – December 10
It’s been a year since I’ve roamed around campus, sat in a classroom and walked across that stage into the unknown of this post-grad journey I’m on.
Within these past 3 months, since my last update, a lot has shifted in my life. When I look at the entire year of 2017 in hindsight, I can acknowledge major accomplishments, the things I’ve learned and the many types of emotions I’ve dealt with.
One of the biggest things I’ve come to realize is that the saying “time flies” is all in your head. I could easily say that my first year out of college flew by and look at my age and be worried about the things I “should” be doing, but I’m not and it feels good.
Student Loans
In my last update I told y’all that I deferred my loans when my grace period ended, and that’s where they will stay until I’m able to start making payments. Recently I said that if I were to get my hands on $100,000, I’d pay off my loans in-full so I wouldn’t have to worry about monthly payments and debt. That’d be nice.
Employment
I went from having no job to two jobs to no job… again. During the first 6-7 months of being out of school, I was unemployed and looking for jobs in the field I studied in college. I was even open to do an internship, but none of that happened. So, I was able to work on my YouTube channel full-time, it just wasn’t making me any money at the time.
At the end of July I was faced with having to move out of my hometown of Charlotte, NC. I haven’t talked about my living situation in any of my updates, but since it ties in with working I’ll share a piece of it.
Once you graduate from college you usually have the two options of getting your own place or moving back home with your parents. Mine was a tricky situation, but is working out the way it’s meant to.
For the first half of my post-grad journey, I was living in my mom’s apartment unemployed, building my YouTube channel, searching for jobs in my field and getting my sister through her last semester of high school. At the end of July I moved in with my aunt, started working at Chipotle and doing my seasonal scare acting job.
However, working two jobs and living in someone else’s home that was difficult to film in caused me to upload less on YouTube because I didn’t have the time nor space to film like I did before. I did this for a little over 3 months, saved some money and made the decision to move to Texas where my mom moved to.
It’s been 2 weeks since I’ve been here and this part of my journey will allow me to save money and get back on track with my channel. I’ve been working on transferring my Chipotle job, which has been a hassle so far, so I may find another place to work in the meantime so I can have some money coming in.
Social Life
Working allowed me to meet new people and socialize with all walks of life on a regular basis. I haven’t built any new long-term relationships yet, but I’ve come to learn that everyone you come across and connect with serves some greater purpose, even if you talk to them once and never see them again. That’s one of the reasons why I believe conversations with strangers are some of the best conversations you’ll ever have.
Working at Chipotle put me in a position where I’d build some type of relationship with the regulars that would come in. Seeing the same faces frequently, the conversations we had and the way they made me feel all impacted my life all in its own unique way. Even the not-so-friendly people.
As far as my coworkers, at both jobs, at times I felt out of place and then other days I felt happy and had a good time. At the end of my time at Chipotle, that’s when we started to get new people that I really clicked with and it kind of made me wonder why they couldn’t have started working there when I did.
I’m also trying to be ok with letting friends who’ve served their purpose go, I’ve been going through that a lot lately with some of the close friendships I hold.
Since moving, I’ve noticed myself eager to put myself out there so I can get to know new people, which is so important anyway since I’m in a new place I’ve never been before, plus I don’t know anyone here.
Mental State
I went through a very dark period mid-September where I was just mad, sad and disappointed at everything. This lasted for 2 weeks and once my birthday came around in October I tried to ease up on the sadness so I could enjoy my birthday but I just felt alone.
That’s when I got into crystal healing, learning how to manifest what I want and doing things that will help me rebalance myself spiritually.
Accomplishments
From the moment I graduated, I wondered “what’s next?” A year from the moment I graduated, I say whatever is next isn’t going to be the same as what is now because things are always changing. I can only control what I can control, so by setting intention on what I want and going toward it, that’s what I’ll do. And even my intentions will change as life goes on because nothing stays the same.
I sum up my first year out of school as a year of manifestations. Within these last 3 months I’ve come to an understanding as to what I want in life but this whole time since graduating I’ve been struggling trying to figure out what that thing was when I really knew all along and was striving to get there subconsciously.
For instance, me searching for a job in my field but not really caring if I got called for an interview and turning down offers that didn’t sit right with me. I didn’t want to admit that what I’m doing with YouTube is one of the things I’m supposed to be doing, so I should stop worrying about getting hired to do communications at some fortune 500 company or settling in a cubicle.
When it comes to life outside of work, I’ve also come to the conclusion that there isn’t a such thing. My life is my life. The things I do, the titles I hold and what I’m interested in are simply things that make up for who I am. Career, family, social, financial, physical, spiritual, mental; it all goes together. So instead of trying to separate them, I should understand what it is I want as a whole, why I want it and strive towards it.
It sounds very philosophical, and it is. My biggest accomplishment is coming to the realization of all of this.
Read all the updates for the year:
9 Month Post-Grad Update
6 Month Post-Grad Update
3 Month Post-Grad Update
